I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Randomize