So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
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