my text book just quoted the cookie monster
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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