I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
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