Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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