There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
