Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
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