wrigley field is MILF paradise
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
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