just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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