I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
operation harelip BJ is a go
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
