I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
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