Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I know her cup size but not her name....
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
