i just google imaged poop.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize