so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
