I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Randomize
