Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
that may or may not have been my penis.
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