i don't like sucking hair
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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