would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
