Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
