TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
