is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Randomize
