Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
