i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize
