After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
