So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
