i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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