ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
