Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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