The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
