exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
