Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
