I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
His nipple licking is glorious
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