This is not my ceiling
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
we're making bets on your personal life
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Randomize
