So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize