Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Randomize
