Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Randomize
