Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
