He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
We are all done wearing pants today
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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