I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Randomize
