she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
