i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Randomize
