He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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