i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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