I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Blood and glitter go together right?
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
be right there i have to get my cape
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
