We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
