Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
