Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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