I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Randomize
