Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
