You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
